Do Masochists Make You Feel Like This Woman?
We all have our own idiolect: idiosyncratic ways we use certain words.
In my own mind I often distinguish between humiliation and degradation. Not clearly or consistently.
For me degradation is most often the physical side of being treated as inferior. Scrubbing floors would be an instance. Forced to eat unpleasant food another.
Humiliation I most often association with consensual emotional sadomasochism.
There’s also humbling: gentle inferiority. Eating food, ordinary food, from a bowl. Being a pet. Being humble can be sweet and gentle. An occasional swat doesn’t conflict with a pat on the head.
My internal jargon important. I’m seeking distinctions for which there is no really ready terminology.
(Train of thought interruption. I stuck a Grace Jones CD in my player only to discover that some component seems to have died.)
Man Looks into Masochist’s Mind
When I suggested the term contempt play I meant emotional violence, particularly verbal sadism.
SSC, RACK verbal S&M to be sure. There are lines that should never be crossed.
I’m very difficult, perhaps impossible to really humiliate. I know about my limitations, flaws and failures. But there as aspects of my life I wouldn’t want used in spoken humiliation. They are behaviors that I wish I didn’t possess, could eliminate.
I’m happy with my gender, race and sexuality. But given the right tone mocking me for those things would plunge me deep down. I’ve often wished to me scored – in a scene – for my masochism and submissiveness. I’m ashamed of neither.
Mostly I crave the tone. The condemnation, contemptuous laughter, sheer scorn. For me this would be cathartic. I’d cringe, perhaps even cower waiting for you to stop. The days following I’d feel uplifted and view the world with vivid delight.
Humiliation and degradation can be funny activities. Once Alexandra rolled a raw egg along my butt crack. I was so baffled that I fell out of submissive emotional space. Later when I asked her why she said it was to humiliate me. I’ve never understood that. And will go to my grave puzzled.
Just Plain Swell Female Top
(The next day: this entry didn’t turn out that well.)
Originally posted 2013-10-04 03:34:57.