Paul Baresi being a blonde young man such a severe OTK hand spanking. He must have just started since the youth’s buttock’s are still white.
Originally posted 2016-01-24 20:57:01.
Not having given alt.com a dime I haven’t done more than browse the locals and read my LoveDog mismatch reports.
Imagine going to a news site and reading a headline proclaiming Something Happened or Today Isn’t Yesterday.
So many profiles just say “looking for something new.” Or “want to try something different.” Really grabs your interest doesn’t it?
Some profile headlines are so badly constructed that someone who sounds like a top proves to really be a bottom who hasn’t the tiniest ability at self-expression.
This vagueness is frustrating. And it seems to apply to the majority of profiles.
I understand that part of it is timidity. Having never dared speak their desires aloud to anyone they are nervous when they sit at their keyboard.
These folks can easily be dismissed as not worth the time. But, you know, I bet many of them are. Or would be if we had a clue as to what they want.
Rather a sad loss.
Originally posted 2016-01-24 20:57:00.
Contempt Play is Serious Play
One of the interesting – and for me initially surprising – differences among tops is their feelings about degrading and humiliation a submissive partner ro playmate.
Almost all male tops seem to enjoy humiliation. Women seem more divided: yes, no, maybe, ewwww! A whole lot of submissive men are also emotional masochists.
Submissive men desire to be dehumanized, degraded who are in relationships with dominant women who don’t enjoy that kind of dominance often seem frustrated. Even becoming angry with her. Or at least sullen and withdrawn.
( – Yes, yes a submissive person is supposed to only do what she desires, etc., etc. Really submissive men and women are individuals and not round objects to be shoved into square holes. – )
How serious is this divide. Is it as wide as the gulf between masochistic men and their vanilla girlfriends and wives? I hope not. Those folks should just be realistic and split up, get a divorce. Why kid yourself into years of pain that isn’t a pleasure?
My own sexuality has evolved and changed in response to so many things I’ve lost count. Would it help a top feel comfortable to humiliate us if we used different words?
Contempt play. With the emphasis on play. Perhaps it can help the dominant partner understand that we know that we aren’t really worthless. That we don’t deserved to be treated like trash.
Contempt play is a form of role play. It can range from being treated as an unimportant object to a person who should be emotionall assaulted merely for being alive.
Why do some of us crave to be treated like garbage? I do have some ideas about the source and origin of my own emotional masochism. But we’d have to be mighty close for me to share the secret with you.
Talk to me about consensual erotic humiliation and degradation.
Originally posted 2016-01-24 20:56:59.
Varieties of Ruined Orgasmic Experience
Poor Old Mr. Penis
Ruined Orgasm I
Many years ago during a period when I was looking for an outlet for my masochism a man who wrote me had a sadistic desire that was new to me.
The guy wanted to tie me up and masturbate me to and past orgasm. The continued massaging of my penis would eventually become painful. Having been a sometimes too enthusiastic wanker I knew my penis could become sore. What an exciting idea. (Sadly he decided that he wanted to explore his own masochism and we never met.)
Ruined Orgasm II
A device, finger, dildo, Aneros prostate massager is used to stimulate a man’s prostate gland. This forces him to ejaculate without having any sort of orgasm.
Technically there is no orgasm involved but involunatarily mimicking the results of an orgasms is dehumanizing and humiliating.
This has always struck me as a very moving experience. To have your physiological response manipulated inddependent of your actions or intenions.
Ruined Orgasm iII
A few years later focussing exclusively on F/m BDSM I read an entry on male genital manipulate:
No lubrication is used, and the glove is not allowed to slide over the organ. At the first twitch, pulsation, or other indication of approaching orgasm, she quickly removes her hand. She does not resume the almost mechanical “Milking” for a full minute. Sixty seconds is a long time when excitement is high. It is, however, necessary to wait out the full time prior to resumption. This same routine is carried out again and again, ceasing each time that there is the slightest muscle twitch observed or suspected. During the sixty seconds that the “Milking” is not taking place, the Mistress should tell the slave how well he is doing, how much pleasure she will get from his having a dribble orgasm, how displeased she will be if he has strong contractions, how he must relax and not do anything to spoil her pleasure, etc. This, in conditioning terms, is the reinforcement stage. The grand finale is a little squirt from the cock slit, followed by his slime slowly oozing out. While this is occurring Mistress should again give positive reinforcement. …
My synapses contorted themselves into new shapes when I read that. I wish I’d copied the entire, quite long, entry. The blog is long gone but it always seemed to actually be written by a woman in a F/m power exchange relationship.
How profoundly humbling to have one of a man’s greatest delights so diminished, made feeble.
Ruined Orgasms IV
From another F/m blog:
I then very quickly and vigorously, almost viciously, from behind, jerk his organ with my rubber gloved hand. He is so tense that it rarely takes even a minute before he is ready to spurt. I am watching this very closely and as soon as I note a slight start of a spasm I stop, take my hands away, step back and watch amused as he spurts, in a most frustrating fashion into his condom.
I assure you there is no orgasm when this method is employed, try it yourself and see! The look of frustration, total and utter frustration, is a picture to behold. Even now after several years of this treatment, he cannot quite comprehend just how frustrating the experience is. It leaves him yearning and desiring satisfaction, dreaming of what he used to experience. He remains totally unrelieved of his sexual tensions and urges, indeed they are multiplied ten-fold as a consequence of the frustration of being so near, yet so far from an orgasm. All that has been released is his semen, not his sexual tension.
This blog entry was much longer. I was rapt with helpless fascination. But clearly the account was fiction presented as truth. Perhaps only to give the story a greater sadomasochistic thrill.
Ruined Orgasm Summary
The first is pure S&M. The masochist’s penis is forced to endure pain. This is so much the opposite of what is expected from the genitals that it is almost shocking.
The second is also pure physical manipulation of a man’s sexual organs. His power over himself is literally taken away. It seems like a species of consensual sexual assault.
In the third a man is masturbated in a carefully structured manner. The goal is to elicit an orgasm without pleasure. The man’s body is pushed to climix perhaps by duration.
With the fourth we find a man caculatingly brought to orgasm only to have the stimulation removed with cunning timing to render the orgasm pleasureless.
The first and second kinds of male sexual manipulation are actually practiced.
The third and four have captured the mind’s of masochistic men as the most humiliating. Especially number four. It is the kind of ruined orgasm men search the web for.
The Runied Orgasm Myth
A BDSM urban legend I think. Of course I speak only with the authority of my own body.
I’ve certainly had orgasms that I felt could’ve been better.
I’ve had orgasms after taking my hand from my penis just a moment too soon.
Sometimes I’ve had orgasms that didn’t result in ejaculation. My body still shuddered. Pleasure surged through me.
Even my mildest, most flawed and least competently achieved orgasms gave me pleasure.
Your can be over-masturbated to pain. Your prostate can be massaged to ejaculation without orgasm.
But even the most minimal orgasm is fun.
Originally posted 2016-01-24 20:56:58.
The other day I noted one of my favorite images of female domination. I find very little BDSM imagery that excites me.
So much of it is genital sex. Nothing wrong with that but that isn’t what stirs me in a special way. But my head beneath a top’s boot – as I know from real life – is one of those livable symbols of submission that fills my heart with the humility that my arrogant self often craves.
From an old magazine, Butch. More to come.
Originally posted 2016-01-24 20:56:57.
I am always looking for Femdom and BDSM artwork from my image sites.